On being human

"But, 

You're only human!"

Only human 

- who makes the impossible possible everyday by sheer diligence!

- who transformed the world by purely genius inventions!

- whose intellect is unparalleled!

- who can do anything you set your mind to!

- who can withstand any storm!

- who will rise upon falling, 

   if only -

   to fall again

   Or,

   better still - fly!

Yes, you're only human 

- you have follies -

but still,

you rise above them all!

Only human 

- not God, 

nevertheless,

he resides within you,

making you supremely powerful!

Yes, alas, you're only human

(Too tall / too short,

Just mediocre / too smart,

Too fair / colored......)

But,

guess what?

Being human 

is -

your superpower!

Invest it wisely!

Sitting idle in front of the chattering fan

Sitting idle

In front of the chattering fan

With so much in mind

And nothing at hand

While there is much to do -

Mountains to climb,

Forests to traverse,

Rivers to cross;

And yet - no strength to actually gather

No heart to amuse

No mind to alight.

Trying to take a step ahead

But retreat backwards

Trying to start a task

Yet halt before it's begun

Nothing seems to make sense

Thoughts reeling in circles

Brain - a kaleidoscope of empty feelings

So i decide to take a break

Realizing that i am already in one

Lest i don't break

Acknowledging -

soon

The fog will lift

The tears will stop

The fears backtrack

Strange - as everything seems now

Will demystify itself

And will make sense

again - of this gibberish 

For darkness dooms

So light can dawn

Troubles hover

To make way for delight

And fidget

Disappears into the calm.

The Road Taken...

I've taken my decision

Rattled up my brain

Sure, it takes guts 

To walk the uncertain path

Which is still better than -

no path at all.

Life is not only about winning

It's about losing too

And gracefully at that

And picking every crumbled brick

And building your dream wall again -

One baby-step at a time - 

And consistently at that.

Sure, it's easier treading the other safe path

But for life to have more meaning

You must follow your heart.

The bigger picture is not -

If it was - 

safe or tricky,

easy or tough,

rocky or smooth.

Once you do your thing, 

Nothing will matter more,

than your passion itself.

At the end, what matters is -

the journey you pursue,

the learnings you imbibe,

the magic you create.

And what seems so undoable at the beginning

Will sort itself out 

And fall into its proper place.

Everything will align with the divine - 

whole of the universe

And you will resonate with that frequency,

that you - 

created, 

propagated,

imbibed -

for eternity.

किताबों की दुनिया

क्या अजब है किताबों की रंगभरी जादुई दुनिया!

जिसमें आप स्वयं को भुला देते हैं या ढूंढ लेते हैं –

किसी पात्र में या लेख में

या लेखक के भावार्थ में, जो उसने समझाया

या(/और) आपने समझा

जो उसने साझा किया

या फिर नहीं - पर आपने समझा।

आप कितनी ही ज़िंदगियां जी लेते हैं और कितनी बार

कभी लेखक(/लेखकों) की, किताब(/किताबों) की।

कभी आप नदी की तरह हर किरदार में बहते हुए 

तो कभी एक किरदार में सागर को आत्मसात करते।

और अपनी और लेखक की समझ के अनुसार

कभी लाल तो कभी बैंगनी रंग गहरा पड़ता 

आपके मन में सिले किताबों के इंद्रधनुष में!

एक ओर कितनी विस्तृत तो दूसरी ओर कितनी संकुचित है किताबों की दुनिया -

कभी हर ओर फैले हुए छतनार सा

तो कभी स्वयं में समाहित ॐकार सा।

कभी मैं काबुलीवाला के इंतजार में मिनी

तो कभी अतरंगी फलों और सपनों की विक्रेता काबुलीवाला

या फिर कभी उनका आपसी स्नेह।

कभी अमृता प्रीतम की कविताओं की तरह शाश्वत वादा - 

मैं तेनु फिर मिलांगी।

तो कभी सुभद्रा कुमारी चौहान द्वारा रचित झांसी की रानी रूपी वीरांगना।

हर इंसान, जीव, भाव, स्थान, रंग के लिए ख़ास जगह है हमारी किताबों में।

तो चंद सुकून के लम्हे फिर बटोरते हैं और चाय की हर चुस्की के साथ इन किताबों में बुने शब्दों के महासागर को चखते हैं।

Anxiety vs Humanity

Emotions flood my brain

Tears swell up my eyes

Lub-dub Lub-dub - 

pulse hits a century 

And loses!

Sweat, out of the glands, oozes

Flushed - hot and cold - all at once 

Tripping a trippety trip

A mind in conflict, a heart endangered

Familiar monsters overhead,

Fumbling me, having a fit

Still -

I couldn't sit

Crushing the enemy overhead

Anxiety - 0, humanity - love; what a tennis match - only I witnessed!

O, was I overwhelmed -

Or anxiety destined

To break me —

free -

from it's shackles.

I tossed and turned -

Got bruised and burnt

And yet here I stand -

Unparalleled

Time goes tickety tock,

A zillion thoughts flock

Trying to crush me, but trust me,

They empower me as I overpower them

Collected every lemon thrown to crush -

And made a lemonade -

I drank instead

Anxiety is a mean teacher no doubt;

But you the student must be proud —

About what almost got you killed 

Actually made you stronger

Anxiety to the dungeons,

Humanity profounder!

फुरसत की सीख

कभी वायु का गीत सुना है?

या नदी का चहकना?

या किसी पौधे का खिलखिलाना?

परिंदे का बहना?

समय का ठहरना?

सब असंभव सा लगता है?

हैना?

पर यदि चंद फुरसत के पल इस जिंदगी की आपाधापी से चुरा लो

और ठहरकर समय को परखो

तो सब महसूस होगा —

समय ठहर जाएगा

तुमसे बातें करेगा!

और बहुत कुछ सिखा भी जाएगा।

जीवन इतना ही सरल है

शायद हम ही इसे कठिन बना देते हैं।

या फिर ऐसा सोच लेते हैं।

सब सोच का ही तो खेल है!

जो दरअसल वाकई मायने रखता है 

उसे मामूली चीज़ों के बोझ तले दबा देते हैं!

तो अगली बार यदि कोई नदी चहके या पौधा खिलखिलाए

तो उसे आत्मसात करने का प्रयत्न करना 

क्या पता यह एहसास तुम्हें बहुत कुछ सिखा जाए!

श्रुति

२२ श्रुतियों से बना संगीत

उन २२ में आत्मसाक्षात्कार

उन २२ में आत्मविभाजन

कुछ संभव सा 

कुछ असंभव सा - ये सफर

जारी है।

श्रुयते इति श्रुति: - बस इसी ईश्वर की वाणी को

वेदों, धर्मग्रंथों के ज्ञान को सुनना, आत्मसम्मेलन एक उद्देश।

यह तो हुआ शाब्दिक तात्पर्य पर वास्तविक खोज यकीनन शाब्दिक अर्थ से ज्यादा जटिल।

मैं संगीत का नाद तो नहीं पर संगीत में रुचि तो है।

शायद नाम का ही असर है।

वेदों का सुना ज्ञान भी नहीं पर उसके प्रति हमेशा जिज्ञासु।

और न ही मैं देवी पार्वती, बस उनका एक स्वरूप।

आशा है श्रुति से यह मुलाकात आपको रास आई।

All the love, all the power!

Sending your way - 

a little more faith, a little more love - 

by way of this poem. 

All the love, all the power!

How does it feel?

To be in your senses

To be completely able and capable of -

Doing anything and everything

And yet powerless to do the same, nevertheless

When things are out of control

As they are and will be, almost certainly - 

Or not —

It's the perception really,

Everything is always in control

Once you accept whatever happens, which most definitely happens for good.

When you do a good deed

And expect a favourable outcome

It's actually an insult to the very deed

Because expecting from the universe when it owes you nothing isn't

Rather accepting what is offered and savoured as a gift -

Is actually the whole deal.

While it is inconsequential whether you believe in God or not

It is the power of your faith that conquers all.

Hope is that foundation that can withstand any storm

Yes, it will be tested

Despite - it will stand tall.

So, the next time you feel powerless but hope arduously

That is your trove of strength

Because again, 

you might feel that way but -

you never really are powerless

We are our strength

We are our faith

We are powerful!

Brood (/not)!

I was thinking. 

Sorry, not thinking - brooding.

But, both mean the same!

Rest assured, they are not.

While thinking is constructive, brooding, generally is destructive.

Brooding, is, in fact thinking in circles.

"One fine day - I was eating.

I thought let's eat a sweet - a little sugar never hurt anybody - right?

Wrong!

Why? Because the other instant i started fretting about gaining weight!

And further alarm about having to buy new clothes for which I had neither money, time nor patience!

Time! Gosh, these days are busy!

Work eats most of the days and weekends left just pass you by.

Work - am I doing the right thing?

It is not what I have always wanted to do!

At this stage, when I should have travelled the world or at least half of it - I am confined to the walls of my, well, intellect!..."

And thus ensues the soliloquy -

With none to amaze - not even yourself!

That's what thinking in circles does and is!

One fine day you are fine and trust me you are but the next minute brooding has painted a different picture of you, for you!

Bottomline - while we can't help brooding, overthinking that is to say - most of the times, we can still be at peace by the mere act of acceptance!

Accepting that brooding is fine, normal or even beyond normal and so are you!

Because brood or not - all's well!!!

When you are psuedo-silent

My brain never stops talking

From the time I open my eyes to the time i fall asleep,

And even when i am asleep

It keeps on muttering and uttering letters, syllables, words, sentences of the widest variety of bizarre things discoverable, even undiscovered.

And like the wind it touches on one topic and jumps on another sensibly at times and senselessly, randomly almost all other times.

And i try to catch up with it earnestly -

and almost every effort turns futile 

As i am amusingly awestruck with its to the face audacity

And my poor heart mostly too can't keep up with it -

for the brain takes it on a rollercoaster ride of emotions - overwhelming it

While it(the brain) is patting its back in its narcissistic ecstacy.

It takes me to places unknown, unheard of and even unimaginable to reality.

And although i can't fully comprehend it, 

I try to marvel the journey it embarks upon everytime.

Sometimes I'm overwhelmed, disgusted, teary-eyed even at what it does to me.

But for most part I'm thrilled, anticipating the next adventure it has in store for me!

Because you see, my brain just won't stop talking and overwhelming me

But, to tell you the truth, just between you and me, I don't even ever want it to!

नारी

🙏

 

My mother's depiction of the poem...

इस विश्व को जन्म देने वाली

इस विश्व में जन्म लेने वाली

जननी, पुत्री

सरस्वती, लक्ष्मी, दुर्गा, काली

सृष्टिकर्ता, सृष्टिविधाता

अलंकार, अग्नि, समृद्धि, सौम्यता

कर्ता भी, कर्म भी

तेजस्वी भी, शीतल भी

माँ की ममता भी, पुत्री की मनमौजी भी

तपस्वी का तप भी, अप्सरा का आभूषण भी

आक्रोश भी, शांति भी, 

सर्वगुणी, सहिष्णु, 

परमात्मा की पराकाष्ठा —

नारी!